Attachment-The Third Klesha

Affirmation:  I love unconditionally, non-judgmentally and without attachment.

The homily was from John 12:20-33, “(25) whoever loves his life loses it, and whoever hates his life in this world will preserve it for eternal life.”  I must say I was a little worried by this scripture.  I love my life.  Does that mean I am destined to eternal hell?  I’ve worked really hard to reach a place where I can claim that.  I haven’t always felt that way and personally, it feels great.  According to the priest I was in deep trouble.  I really wanted to put my hand up and say, “Father, I don’t believe that.  Can we discuss this a little further?  I have a few ideas and I’d like to open this whole concept up for more discussion.”  Unfortunately, or perhaps, fortunately, that is not an option that I’ve ever seen claimed in the middle of mass.  Oh, I’ve seen people get up and walk out when they disagreed with what was being said but I’ve never (and I’ve been going to church for well over half a century) seen anyone ask for clarification during a sermon. But, that gave me the opportunity to look at this closer and to examine what I think Christ was telling us.  Most of His message is about one thing, Love.  So, how would this scripture be interpreted in the light of love? 

Have you noticed that we are creatures of habit?  Speaking of church, have you noticed that people always tend to sit in the same section, some in the same pew and others only in one specific seat?  Someone sat behind me one day and I heard her say in exasperation, “Someone is in my seat.”  Now, I’m not familiar with all the places of worship in the world but in the churches and synagogues I’ve been in, I’ve never seen a nameplate on the seat of a bench.  I am fascinated by this desire for certainty.  The gym I belong to has several types of fitness classes and there too people seem to need to be in the same place every time they attend a class.  One day, I watched a gentleman set up his equipment in an area he wasn’t aware “belonged” to another lady.  She came into the class and went over to him to tell him he was in her spot.  I was dumbfounded and I must confess I judged harshly even though it had nothing to do with me.  I was curious how this interaction would go and was charmed when the usurper apologized for not paying closer attention, thanked her for informing him and picked up his stuff and moved over.  I’ve also been in a similar situation in a dance class and couldn’t figure out why this woman who came in late kept stepping on my toes as we bounced across the gym floor until I finally realized I was in her spot. 

My main concern with this type of attachment is for my own well-being.  I’m afraid if I stay in the same place whenever I’m in a familiar locale, my mind will stop expanding, my neurotransmitters will get smaller and smaller and so will my whole world.  I know the importance of stepping outside of my comfort zone.  If I’m aware of my desire for routine, even small ones, like eating at the same place in the kitchen every morning or choosing the same food for lunch every day, and choose differently periodically, I know that adjusting to larger challenges will be easier and not only will my mind not shrink but my world won’t shrink.  I don’t want to live in a small world;  I’m all into keeping “green.”

There is a tale about a Buddhist monk who was being threatened by a civilian soldier.  The soldier shouted at him, “Don’t you know who I am?  Don’t you know I can take your life?”  The monk looked at him calmly and said, “Don’t you know who I am?  Don’t you know that I don’t care?” and then he slowly walked away.  That is not being attached.

Patanjali, the grandfather of Yoga claimed that by practicing the eight limbs of yoga one would be helped with conquering the five human afflictions that cause suffering (kleshas):  ignorance, egoism, attachment, aversion and possessiveness.  The third klesha, raga, attraction, creates in us a pattern of acquisition: we began to pursue human relationships, knowledge, wealth, status, power-anything which might be capable of enlarging and protecting our fragile individualized existence. But because change is the nature of creation, all objects within it are impermanent, and thus subject to loss at any moment.   (http://www.physics.udel.edu/~bnikolic/klesa.html)


In the March 1993 issue of Guideposts Magazine there was a short article by Catherine Marshall called Prayer of Relinquishment.  In it, she tells the story of Mrs. Nathanial Hawthorne, wife of the famous American author. Mrs. Hawthorne wrestled in prayer in the city of Rome one day in 1860.  Their oldest daughter, Una was dying.  As she urgently prayed for thier daughter’s healing a strange thought arose in her, she decided to let her go.  She prayed to God to take Una, if that was best. “I give her to Him.  No, I won’t fight against Him anymore.” According to the story, an even stranger thing then happened, minutes later she went back to their daughter’s bedside and found the girl sleeping naturally, without temperature or restlessness.  She was healed.

When I begin my yoga practice, I do three sun salutations.  In the first one I thank God, out loud, “for the beautiful new day” and as I reach for the ground, (uttanassana) I say “and I relinquish it to You.”  In the second one, I thank God for “this amazing life and I relinquish it to You” and in the third salutation I pray, “Thank You, Lord Jesus for this amazing, healthy, healing body and I relinquish it to You.”  Oh, yes I take it back over and over during the day but each morning I begin anew. 

This is the message I believe Christ was sharing with us.  We must die to self.  We must let go of all the stuff that we think we possess, because in reality it possesses us.  We are being called upon to believe in the goodness and ultimate care of a loving God, someone whom we can trust will care for all of our needs.  We don’t need to be in charge.  We don’t need to hold on tight.  We are being called upon to recognize that everything in our life, except God, is temporary and we are being told that when we can recognize and accept that principle, life will be more meaningful, we will be lighter and freer.