Covid 19 - My Day 40

There are new words now in our language and we have all learned them, regardless of whether or not we even speak English.  They arrived suddenly one day and like company that stays too long or is purely obnoxious, they are still with us even after several months.  For some the arrival has brought fear, anxiety, chaos and even death.  We are all facing a strange, unknown threat and most of us are doing our best to “follow the rules” as to not become ill or even worse, to make someone else ill and perhaps be the reason for their demise.  No matter who you are or where in the world you live, you are probably experiencing at the least some sort of stress.  I’ve spoken to many people who seem to have some sort of new physical ailment or one from the past that has reappeared.  It is not uncommon.  Besides many of us find ourselfes wondering whether or not that sore throat or queasy tummy or ingrown toenail might be a sign that the enemy has found a weak spot in our defense.  It’s simply an extremely daunting, challenging time and we, as American are at our best in times like these but I don’t know if any of us understood how long this time might last. 

The Easter Holiday brought the following message to my inbox:

Haven’t seen you lately so here’s an update. I have been working out 2-3 times a day, lost 25 pounds, almost all muscle now. Took up learning Mandarin and have become quite proficient. Have finally got to finish War and Peace as well as all of the works of Tolstoy, Hemingway and Kurt Vonnegut which I have always wanted to get to. I’ve taken up the guitar and have Smoke on the Water down pat. Have tried to write a few songs, sent them to a music house and they tell me some guy I never heard of, Post Malone, wants to record them. I have also become a concert pianist and expert at ice sculpture. It’s been very boring but we all do the best we can. Happy Easter, stay safe and may the force be with you. 

  

I so appreciated the humor and I am sure anyone reading this has also found some relief in the humor that has come along.  I, on the other hand had to reply that the skills my husband and I have honed have been a little more mundane.  He has taken charge of the cleaning, including the vacuuming.  I am his “new” supervisor. 

About forty years ago, we had a friend who won the “sexiest man alive” contest in upstate New York.  It was I recall, a lunchtime event and several men were called up on a makeshift stage and questioned about why they should win the title.  As you can imagine, there were many creative and somewhat risqué answers but our friend won with not only his good looks (which he had) but with the simple statement that he loved to cook and he did the cleaning.  He was unanimously given the title.  I’ve tried to convince my hubby of fifty-two years that there is nothing sexier than a man who likes to cook and clean.  It just took a pandemic to push him into the role I always thought should be his.  

Again, humor has come in many many forms and for the most part, I have let it feed and nurture me.  We had one email that said a couple had decided to not have children and they were going to tell them after dinner.  But, the winner for me so far has been:

https://www.google.com/search?q=woman+in+a+closet+youtube&ie=UTF-8&oe=UTF-8&hl=en-us&client=safari

It was LOL for at least two days and it still brings a smile to my face when I think about it.  I don’t know who this lady is but I would love to meet her and I would love to have her as a friend.  

Also don't miss John Krasinski's YouTube segments called Some Good News.  It's the kind of news I wish were published by our mass medial. It's kind, funny and uplifting. 
https://youtu.be/F5pgG1M_h_U

In one of my favorite books, Spiritual Insights for Daily Living by Elizabeth Fenske, the March 25th reading tells of an old Arab folk tale where Pestilence once met a caravan in the desert on the road to Baghdad.  “Why must you hasten to Baghdad?” Asked the caravan chief.  “To take 5,000 lives,” was Pestilence’s answer.  Later, they met again and the caravan chief said, “You deceived me, Pestilence, instead of 5,000 life’s you took 50,000.” “Nay,” replied Pestilence, “5,000 and not one more-it was fear who killed the rest.”  

I know, we all feel like we are living in a Twilight Zone episode.  I know I do.  I keep thinking any day now, I will wake up from this dream, this bazaar state of the world.  Fear! Anxiety! Stress! Grief! Loss!  Most of us are facing all of these emotions.  Most of us are fairly familiar with them but not on such a continual constant level.  Being who I am, I look for ways to see the silver lining in all the events of my life; sometimes to the annoyance of those around me.  In my first book Creating Positive Affirmations, Living an Intentional Life, I write that, “We cannot control the wind but we can decide how to set the sail.  The wind may blow you all over the world and take you to places you do or do not choose but it is your attitude during the journey and when you arrive that will determine every aspect of the adventure and you can determine that mindset by carefully choosing your self-talk.”    

I am not proposing that you ignore any of your emotions.  As Rumi says, “Welcome and entertain them all.  Be grateful for whatever comes because each has been sent as a guide from beyond.”  Then, take steps to move through those negative feelings.  Most of us know what is required to lift ourselves out of the pit but sometimes we need a reminder and many times we need a friend.  

Here are some of the tools that help me.  I share them with a hope they may also lift you to a “better place.”

1. Believe in a Divine Power that loves you and wants only your best.  It may look nothing like you think it should, but work hard on trusting your God.
2. Reach out either to help another or get help.  Don’t hesitate to ask.  Be humble.  Pick up the phone, write an email or even more unique, send some snail mail.  
3. Exercise.  Find a way.  Take a walk, go up and down the steps, turn on a video, dance to a favorite song or two.  It is a panacea for the blues.
4. Laugh.  Read those silly jokes or find a movie that tickles you funny.  How about anything by Steve Martin but especially my favorite, My Blue Heaven?
5. Eat some chocolate or a little ice cream.  Be kind to yourself.  Be compassionate with yourself. 
6. Take a bath, put some bubble bath in it and light a few candles.   

The list can be endless.  You know what you love.  You know what nourishes your soul and feeds your heart.  Have hope.  Have faith.  If it’s simply too windy for you at any point, lower the sail and take shelter in a safe place and wait.  The time will come again when we can all raise our sails and embrace the adventure of this life.  

Legions of Angels

Affirmation:  I believe I am surrounded and supported by Christ and His legions of Angels and spiritual guides. I am empowered and feel nurtured when I stop and recognize their presence. 

When I first listened to Belleruth Naparstek's CD, Guided Mediation to Help with Chemotherapy I was greatly comforted by her description of spiritual beings who came to assist me with my healing, "some of which look familiar."  As I listened I clearly envisioned the presence of several ethereal beings and yes, one looked very familiar.  He was my father, Francis Grolimund, long deceased but whose memory and presence always seems to be lingering about me.  I've listened to and played that recording dozens of times.  I love to end a yoga session with it.  It's full of hope and tools to encourage healing.

I've been dealing with a chronic ache the last year and a half and found myself feeling weak and discouraged.  I'd done all within my power to help my body heal, much of which revolved around alternative healing.  I did go the western medicine route also but that too did not present an answer. 

When I journal I'm usually writing a stream of consciousness.  I do always try to focus on three joys from the day before and list one for the day to come but otherwise it's just my form of rambling and dumping.  It's a gift I give myself.  I love the practice.  One day, however, I remembered my friend's approach to her morning ritual.  Joan Junginger often talks about her "coffee with Jesus."  Periodically I've tried writing to God or the Angels.  It never seemed to resolve anything but I was becoming quite desperate and decided this one morning to give it another try and to write that letter to Jesus and see if anything new appeared. 

When Joan, cofounder of The Heart's Journey, leads retreats which she recently did for a large group of women at St. Michael the Archangel and which I had attended, she normally encourages the participants to write such a letter and then she instructs them to write a letter to themselves from Jesus.  I heard some remarkable stories from a few of the women who had been doing this exercise for a several years.  I'm sure that's why the journaling on this one morning was taking on a new twist. 

As I wrote out my concerns to the Lord I found a name appearing on the page that I hadn't thought about in a very long time.  This woman, Suzanne Egan, is a massage therapist and a health and wellness coach.  She's lived and worked in my area for many years and is very knowledgeable about the different physicians and practices.  I had struggled with a hip issue for many years when I first showed up at her practice and with her guidance I was led to Sangini Rane of Apex PT, who specializes in Postural Restoration Therapy and who guided me to a pain free hip.  After my journaling was done I immediately contacted Suzanne.  Luckily she was still at the same number.  She responded right away and had several suggestions for my latest challenge that I had not fully investigated.  Even better was the fact that she had a couple of clients who had dealt successfully with the same issue.  She contacted them and got their referrals and then made a few more recommendations of her own.  I know you've had this experience too.  I was being given the gift of hope. 

Then too as I wrote I began to value all the years and hours I had put into my prayer life.  I don't always take credit for the fact that I've been practicing my faith for my whole life and I've been especially fervent for the last 40 plus years.  Each morning I invite all my Angels and especially my guardian Angel, Saranna, and my guides to join me.  It's the prayer I say when I wake and

as I begin my journaling.  It's on the last page of my book, Creating Positive Affirmations,Living an Intentional Life.  

Lord, be united with me this day and always.  I invite You and all those who nurture and guide me, seen and unseen to aid me in bringing glory and honor and praise to this gift of life You have so generously given me.

This particular morning I found myself picturing those spiritual beings manifesting themselves around me but it felt different.  For the first time I felt the presence of a legion of beings, not just the few I'd always called upon.  I felt like a curtain had been raised.  I hadn't been able to see everyone who answered my call until that day.  I had been limiting God's response.  I was shocked to realize my small mindedness.  I've always known we get to choose whether to go to God in prayer with a thimble, a bucket or a pipeline but I hadn't let the knowledge go from my head into my heart and this day, for the first time, it weaved it's way right down into the center of my being.  

I created a new affirmation to cement the concept and have been saying it and writing it every day since then.  

I believe I am surrounded and supported by Christ and His legions of Angels and spiritual guides. I am empowered and feel nurtured when I stop and recognize their presence.  

I've even had visions of those animated armies you see in some of the sci-fi films.  The ones where the beings cover the entire landscape and keep coming over the hills and ridges.  I know it sounds extreme, maybe a little (?) crazy but just like all my affirmations, it brings me a sense of calm and even power, which I had misplaced while dealing with this issue. 

I've followed Suzanne's recommendations and I'm saying my affirmation daily to tap into the Divine army available to my loved ones and me. I can't tell you at this time if I'm cured but something very deep within me has shifted and I am not carrying around that initial sense of weakness and powerlessness any longer.  I've been here before with other physical challenges especially with my hip and many years ago with breast cancer and I must say this is a good place.  My heart and my head are finally united and I'm in a place of hope and positive expectation.

I share this with you in case you too have been going to God with just a small container, not attaching the pipeline that is right there in front of you.  Perhaps, you too will begin to envision a legion of spiritual beings surrounding you and protecting you and giving you the support with whatever you're dealing so that you too will experience hope and peace and feel strong and powerful. 

"May the power of angels come to greet you may they lead you to paradise," both here and in the hereafter.