Monday, July 11, 2011

Creating Community

Affirmation:  I am an integral part of a community of likeminded individuals. 
Because I am open and accepting, I am invited by friends and family to share in fun experiences. 
I find that several of my affirmations revolve around my relationships with family and friends.  I like people but I like some people more when I see them less.  Do you ever feel that way?  When I take the Myers-Briggs Personality Test, I fall half way between the introvert and the extrovert; meaning that I gain energy both from being alone and from being with people.  So, I need to balance that.  I need quiet time and I need time with others.  Of course, all the research shows that health depends a great deal on having an extended support system.  There has been research showing that how well we cope in our older age, depends on our social system.  Being a breast cancer survivor, I’ve read and experienced, how effective support groups are in one’s recovery process. 
There are times when I can feel isolated.  I’m not sure why because between my hubby, children, grandchildren, mother and several close friends, all who live nearby, you’d think I’d be overwhelmed with personal interaction.  But, if I get caught up in comparing myself to others I know, those people who are very popular, you know the ones.  They are the people who are always being asked to every party, every gathering, every fun trip, and every social event.  When I find myself looking at their lives and then examining mine, I wonder if I’ve missed the boat somewhere.  It’s funny because I always tell people and myself to avoid comparisons. I know we compare our worst to everyone else’s best.  We compare our inside to the other’s outside and no one ever wins from such a thought process.  I know this.  But, periodically I still get caught.  This topic is one of those times.  I have several friends who I must admit are amazing at creating personal relationships.  They are the ones who are always heading off to visit or travel with other friends.  I often leave their presence wondering what I’m doing wrong or simply wondering if I really am that different from them. 
So, I decided to remind myself that, I am an integral part of a community of likeminded individuals.  I also decided to affirm that: Because I am open and accepting, I am invited by friends and family to share in fun experiences. 
I truly am a part of a community of likeminded individuals.  They may not all be right around the corner, or even in my town but I know they are out there.  They are all the people who sent me notes and cards and mementos when I was going through cancer treatments.  They are the people I don’t hesitate to contact when I want to be remembered in prayer or need a loved one remembered in prayer.  They are the people who love talk to with me about how to improve the quality of their lives, the people who love to discuss concepts and ideas.  They are the people I know who are always excited about learning, the generous people who donate every year to the Pink Ribbon Yoga Retreat so that women, who can’t afford to attend, get to come for free.  If I focus on all the wonderful people in my community I stop thinking about what I don’t have and instead focus on what I do.  As to the affirmation about being open and accepting, well, that one means, I always say yes.  Yes, I’ll join you.  Yes, I’m ready to go.  Yes, I want to spend time with you.  Isn’t that the secret to strong relationships, sharing experiences and spending time together? 

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